


Burn Your Kingdom Down

by aliveanddrunkonsunlight



Series: armies couldn't keep me out [2]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2020-02-26 15:47:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18720142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aliveanddrunkonsunlight/pseuds/aliveanddrunkonsunlight
Summary: Jaime and Brienne talk before they leave Winterfell for King's Landing.*He teases her as much as he always had, ever since he was her captive, but Jaime knows when to soften his wit and let her into his mind and heart. It’s the greatest honor of her life, for her to love a man like him, and for her to be loved by him in return.





	Burn Your Kingdom Down

Brienne finds the build up to their departure from Winterfell worse than the wait for the arrival of the wights. Winterfell has become a home to her. Other than her family home in Tarth, it’s the place she’s stayed the longest. She felt valued here. First, by Sansa, who preferred Brienne by her side as her sworn protector, but also looked to her as a counselor and confidante. Then when Arya arrived, Brienne could sense the uneasiness between the two sisters, and yet Arya admired her for her strength and fighting skills. 

And now, she was being valued in another way, one she had written off ever happening. She was loved. He’d come to her after the battle, when neither were really themselves, trying to choke out a string of words, his voice falling to a whisper. Brienne had almost laughed at the earnestness on his face, because she couldn’t understand what could be so important, until she did, suddenly, and was glad to find the truth in his eyes. It wasn’t a jape. 

She had kissed him then because she hadn’t quite known else to do when he was looking at her like that, and as they fell asleep, wrapped up in one another, she half expected him to change his mind by the time they awoke. 

But he hadn’t. 

He teases her as much as he always had, ever since he was her captive, but Jaime knows when to soften his wit and let her into his mind and heart. It’s the greatest honor of her life, for her to love a man like him, and for her to be loved by him in return. 

Brienne’s always been a warrior first, before anything else, but the thought of yet another battle in King’s Landing makes her stomach turn. She and Jaime have always found a way to protect each other, but she doesn’t think she can protect him from this. From his kin, his blood. His sister. 

In the strategy meetings, she’s heard what has been said. Tyrion believes Cersei to be pregnant. Nothing further needed to be stated. Jaime hadn’t come to her chambers that night. 

But he’s there the next. A soft knock and she doesn’t even get up to check the door, simply calls for him to come in. She’s already changed into her bed clothes, but he’s still wearing the same clothes from the meeting the day before, and wonders if he’s been up all night. His face is gaunt and expressionless and he’s unable to look her in the eye. A pit grows in Brienne’s stomach, waiting for him to tell her he’s decided to return to King’s Landing, to return to his sister. “If it’s true…” he starts, but he falls quiet, his silence making her wary. 

“If it is,” she says quietly, gently. “What would you want?” 

Jaime draws himself up to his full height and his gaze doesn’t waver when it meets hers. “It wouldn’t alter my feelings.” 

She tucks her chin to her chest to hide the flush in her cheeks. “That’s not what I was asking,” she replies, shaking her head. His shoulders slump in exhaustion and she places a tentative hand on his arm, guiding him to sit on the bed, before sitting down next to him. His warm palm finds hers like they’ve always done this. Not like it’s new, precarious still, the confusion about the depth of their feelings. Not like Cersei doesn’t have a price set on both of her brothers’ heads. “If you want to be with her, be with your child, I would understand. I would be okay.” 

“Gods, woman. You are stubborn as the winter is long.” He unlaces his fingers from hers and cups her cheek so she’ll look at him. “If I tell you that I love you every hour of every day, how long would it take before you believed me? You’re the one I’ve chosen.” He kisses her gently at first, pauses as if he’s about to draw away, before kissing her again, deeper and more insistent. She lets a hand rest on the back of his neck, her fingers sliding into the hair at the nape of his neck, short but soft. “Besides,” he says when they’ve managed to part from each other. “Do you really think the Dragon Queen intends to let my sister live?” 

“She let you live.” 

“Because of you.” The assurity in his voice makes her shiver. “It’s true,” he speaks up again, “that I was never allowed to be a father to Myrcella or Tommen. Joffrey was…” Jaime shakes his head, trailing off. “But gods know I tried.”

“I would understand if you wanted to change that now,” she replies solemnly. And she does understand. No doubt Jaime, this Jaime, her Jaime, could have a wonderful impact on his child’s life.  _ But Cersei would still be its mother. _

“Ever since we were young, Cersei liked having me in her grasp. I joined the Kingsguard because of her, I kept quiet because of her, I stayed in King’s Landing because of her. But Cersei has never protected me from anything. I’m not sure she has ever told me the truth. It might have taken me my whole life to figure that out, but it’s why I very much doubt the child is mine.” 

“But how can you be so sure she’s not telling the truth about this?” The words are out of Brienne’s mouth before she even thinks about them and the hurt which flashes across Jaime’s face cuts her like a knife. 

“You believe her then?” He snaps, his tone accusatory, bitter. 

“I don’t know,” she stammers. 

“I haven’t been with Cersei in many moons. The child cannot be mine.” Jaime rises from the bed. “I should let you rest.” He’s never dismissed her so quickly.

“No, wait, Jaime. Please stay.” His back is already to her, but he pauses. “Please. I’m sorry.” When he turns to look at her, all his fear, all his worry, comes crashing towards her like a wave, slamming into her body and threatening to pull her out to sea. “Jaime,” she murmurs as he falls into bed beside her. She may not be able to stop the flood of thoughts which are torturing him, but she can at least touch him, care for him, tell him she loves him, and hope that even a tiny bit of it will somehow breach his walls. Her hands move softly through his hair and she bends down to press a kiss to his temple. Her fingers trail across his cheek, tipping up his chin with her thumb, and kissing him there.

“Brienne,” he murmurs, his green eyes are shining with emotion. His hand tugging at her hip to pull her closer, but she shakes her head, continuing her slow path over his body. “I love you,” he says softly at one point and she looks up to see tears in his eyes. “I’m sorry.” 

“I know,” she replies, nodding. “And you have me.” 

Neither of them know what tomorrow will bring, what the journey to King’s Landing will wrought, but for tonight, they take solace in each other, her name on Jaime’s lips. 


End file.
